a stinky new low

So, when it rains it pours around here I guess. I can never be trusted to put something on the stove (or in the oven for that matter) and just go check one thing or write one thing or send one email. I am a good cook and generally not a forgetful one with the big exception being when I am at my computer. And not cooking. But things are cooking on the stove. You see the problem. About 40 minutes ago I put almost a half gallon of goat milk on to bring it up to a quick simmer so I could make yogurt. Heat the milk. Cool it down. Add the starter. Pour into the machine. Set the timer. Walk away. Sounded easy enough to do while in the middle of work. The only part I could screw up I did. I forgot the milk on the stove and it boiled absolutely everywhere. Oh, the lost goat milk (raw, directly from the farm). Oh, the mess. Oh, the smell. I can walk away from the mess but the fucking burned all over the burner smell is killing me. Cooking and working just don’t mix for me I guess. And I used to be such a good multi-tasker. Eh.

payback is certainly called a bitch around here

Blogger is being really weird at the moment and my last few posts have been posted and reposted in different states of completion. Bear with me.

Last night I searched round for my night guard (for teeth clenching) for about 20 minutes. It could only have been in 1 of say 3 places but it wasn’t. Instead it was under my bed in about 20 pieces chewed all to hell by my dog. It is going to be a crappy week on my jaw but thankfully my dentist’s office got me in for a new fitting this morning. I was seething all night and morning that it was going to cost me 375 motherfucking bucks to replace but my awesome dentist’s office decided to give me a deal of $225. I love them.

So, is this some sort of fucked up payback for telling Henry that the dog ate his crappy plastic toy? Seriously, we have had her for over 4 years and she has never chewed up a thing. I can hardly think of any single thing in this house, except for a couple pieces of furniture and our computers, which would cost more to replace. And she couldn’t destroy and ingest them under the bed.

On the other hand, the dental receptionist said this is a pretty common issue. Apparently dogs find the saliva-covered pieces of plastic irresistible. Maybe it was just my appealing saliva and not my lies.

happiness

Since I can't come up with much to say at the moment, I thought I would share this photo I received recently from a friend in Tibet. It just sort of struck me.

worthless post (complaining ensues)

This is the fairly worthless post that says that I am still alive and everyone I know is alive (I think/hope). Henry and I have a miserable cold and we’re coughing and blowing our noses and trying to sleep a lot. The weather is beautiful, which actually isn’t so nice when I’m sick. I am way behind at work and doing a crappy job holding on to the appearance that I am managing. I still haven’t even tried to find a new babysitter. And. I just this second found a white hair that’s as long as my longest non-white hair. That’s the first time that’s happened and I can’t say I’m happy about it. Now, I should either get to work or get to sleep, I can decide which.

truth, lies, and too much remembering

Henry’s ability to recall things is a bit disconcerting sometimes. As we were just rocking before bed he was telling me about things that happened recently and things he has seen on tv (he has been sick and watching too many cartoons) and things that Jason or I said to him. Have I mentioned that he uses fake voices to repeat back to us what we have said? This is odd enough in and of itself I tell you. So, he starts telling me about something that happened in a cartoon he watched. It wasn’t very detailed and he basically just told me there was a moose on the doodlebops and that a doodlebop couldn’t find his robe. No big deal, except that I am certain he hasn’t seen that show any more recently than two and a half months ago. We watched it earlier in the summer once when I was tired (I remember the moose) and didn’t have a babysitter and needed to wake up before starting the day. He wasn’t even 2 yet and I have hardly heard mention of it since. How in the hell can he remember that? Fwiw, I am not convinced that Henry is particularly unique in this regard it just blows me away.

In a related event, one morning about a month ago, Henry and I played with a piece of crap plastic party favor that was surely a choking hazard for about an hour. He had already broken it in a bunch of ways and it included a small green plastic ball that ultimately rolled under the guest bed. It was naptime so we left it there and I threw it away a day or two later along with the rest of the broken parts. He asked for it a few times and then seemed to have forgotten. Then, a week ago, I was sleeping in the guest room (snoring issues coupled with my very light sleeping lately) and Henry came in. I believe his first offense was turning on the overhead light and then he started demanding that we find the green ball “right there!” under the bed immediately. I was clearly half asleep and not thinking because I told him that it was gone and, oh, I don’t know, maybe dee dee (the beagle) had something to do with it. Yes, I lied to him. I am just not that sharp in the morning. Now he randomly tells me “dee dee ate green ball” and shakes his head. I feel sort of bad and sort of stupid but mostly just afraid that he will never ever forget and when he’s old enough to realize that this particular dog does not eat toys I am going to be in big trouble. I think I will go look for a replacement piece of crap party favor soon. Preferable one that comes in a multi-pack so I don’t ever have to lie again. At least not about something so stupid.

why not magic?

For one, Henry can use a computer. He can’t read but he knows how to use a mouse to navigate to links and to the play button on a media player. He’s very diligent with his clicking and knows which links go where at yo gabba gabba. This is simply a product of our own laziness since we let him watch a couple of short clips online and were too slow in hitting repeat for him. He decided to do it himself. Now he runs for the computer and starts navigating to all sorts of random pages. I think this is not a good thing for many, many reasons.

The kid is too smart sometimes. He has been carrying around a matchbox with a few dried beans in it for a few days (don’t ask). I keep telling him they are magic beans and he just looks me in the eye and says “no” or “nope” while shaking his head. He doesn’t even know what magic is and he believes me when I tell him about all manner and definitions of other things. Why not this one?

notes from the field

The morning got off to a bit of a rocky start since I woke up about 20 times all night long. I got out the door late and as I am unaccustomed to driving in real morning traffic I was late. Now for hours I have been sitting in a big, modern, beautiful conference room with my back to windows looking over the city. The room is full of developers, planners, lawyers and PR people. Generally I can tell them apart by what they are wearing. I am bored. My contribution is fairly minimal but so far less awkward than expected and semi-interesting. Actually the detailed plans for a destination golf resort really aren’t interesting at all. By my calculations, this 8-hour meeting is costing the client over 20 grand. Actually, just observing how our project process, usually focused on land planning, works and doesn’t work within this developer process will be valuable and useful for future discussions and internal program planning. At the moment I feel like I can make the observations in my sleep, which is clearly necessary.

Hours have passed. I went from mildly interested and reevaluating my current work life this morning, which has me working at home or with a minimum of three people at a time most days. Coming downtown, wearing adult clothes, eating good catered food, working in a beautiful building, all felt pretty good for a few hours. If only it were possible to have the above without wading through incredible amounts of bullshit spewed by ridiculously paid assholes with big egos. I imagine it must be possible but I am reminded that I am in the wrong arena. I am reminded that I absolutely do not love what I do. Good god, if I never have to work with another politician or PR expert, particularly on land use issues, I would be a happier, or a least less pissed off, person. At least the chocolate filled and desserts are amazing.

A side not: Maybe it’s a lawyer thing but I don’t think I’ve ever seen mouthwash (with the firm’s name on the large pump bottle) in a firm’s restroom. If I had, I would have guessed it would have been at a dentist.

short update

Life is crazy and busy and the same as usual. I have been sleeping like hell and am too tired to write anything interesting. Henry is very funny and cute and happy making lately. I am looking into daycare or babysitter options and am feeling a bit put out by the whole thing. I have to leave the house for an all day meeting at 7:20 tomorrow morning that is being held in a fancy law office. I found one outfit I could passably fit myself into. It will work but I am none to happy about the whole thing for a few reasons. Awkwardness and possible boredom being top of the list. I haven’t been to the gym in a week and I am trying to crunch through some graphic design work at the moment even though I’m really not feeling it. My client just emailed me that color of some text on the latest draft “is great, but I'd like it in a fun font....modern, elegant, chic, fun, weird.” Really now, what in the fuck am I supposed to do with that? I’ll take any suggestion you’ve got.