my apologies

If my kid swears at you or calls you a name it’s probably my fault. I have been amazed at how long it has taken Henry to adopt any swear words given my lack of attempts to control my language. A few weeks ago as we were looking at some photos his grandparents sent, he burst out with, “holy crap! There's a fire truck.” Jason and I both laughed so hard we couldn’t breathe, which was, of course, the wrong reaction. He actually has only said it once or twice since except that every time we drive by a particular building under construction in our neighborhood he says, “holy crap, that building is getting taller and taller.” Every time.

Also a few weeks ago, he was engaging in his occasional crotch grabbing behavior. I can’t even remember if he was wearing clothes and I said, “hey, penis grabber.” To which he replied, “What, penis talker?” The thing that killed me was that many hours later I told Jason that Henry had called me a name and he overheard and laughed and said, “yeah, I called you penis talker.” Language acquisition is freaking amazing.

In addition, if he asks you for alcohol, which he will enunciate very clearly and with joy, not to worry. He is most surely asking for rubbing alcohol to get the sap off of his dirty bare feet.