on the edge

We survived The North Dakota Experience™ fairly well with a few highs and lows, none of which were too extreme. Henry is an amazing traveler but having tons of people around to entertain him didn’t hurt. We have been back home since Tuesday and Jason’s parents are still staying with us. This is ok. They are nice and looove Henry. The problem is that I haven’t had any time to myself in almost 2 weeks. Work has been insane all week in a very heavy-conflict, dealing with an egomaniacal asshole sort or way. It has been very out of the ordinary and I am taking things too seriously and personally (maybe) and I want to cry a lot. I am having my period complete with a sleepless night full of cramps. I am trying to balance all of this with getting ready for Henry’s birthday party tomorrow. Pasta is probably boiling over now (actually it didn’t boil over, it became spontaneously, grossly over-cooked). Henry has been sleeping weird but is back to eating constantly. The down side is that he is demanding food that we don’t have in the house and isn’t much interested in substitutes. Too bad for him. He is also crazy clingy (UP! Mama!) this morning but once he’s up he just whines and doesn’t know what he wants. Most unfortunately, he has decided that it would be a good idea to touch dog poo the last couple of days. Previously he pointed out and shunned it as taught, so it was much to my surprise that he just came in with his grandma following another poo touching incident. It’s like these people (the grandparents) are making it happen and somehow my mother-in-law got caught up in it this last time and has now been in the basement for 10 minutes scrubbing shoes. I just fielded another call on the work conflict and resolution may be closer but I am too drained to care (almost).

Really, it is beautiful outside. Things are all ok over all and I know this will pass but I can’t pull myself out of this shitty state. I have calls into my intuitive friend and neurobiologist, Sufi, naturopath. Perhaps one of them can shed some light and lend a hand. Otherwise, I may be curled up in bed by noon. Doubtful though. As always, I will suck it up and do what has to be done. I just wish for once I didn’t have to.